In the Colorado Snow

Walking home under the northern lights

You could see clear across the world to the other side

And the snow fell so still like music to the ground

And I'd take refuge in that holy sound.

(from Jennifer Berezan's "Refuge")

We got about ten inches of snow over the past 24-hours, so school was canceled for the day. That meant that my appointments were all rescheduled, and Brian stayed in to work from home. This also meant that Bosco got to spend some time watching us wrestle with the layer covering the driveway and sidewalk, which entertained him much more than us.

After a couple of weeks wishing we could move past the bitter cold and into spring, this shock of winter has reminded me of the joy that we find in snuggling in for a day to watch the peaceful world blanketed in white outside.

Run the Gamut

I have a thousand brilliant lies
For the question:
How are you?

I have a thousand brilliant lies
For the question:
What is the Beloved?

If you think that the Truth can be known from words,
If you think that the Sun and the Ocean
Can pass through that tiny opening
Called the mouth,
O someone should start laughing!
Someone should start wildly Laughing!

Someone Should Start Laughing by Hafiz

In this world of superficial how-do-you-do's and rushed human encounters, this resonated with me. I am sharing in hopes that it might lift the spirits of someone else as well.

If You Love Somebody, Better Tell 'Em While They're Here

This has been a rough week. Bosco had to have an emergency surgery to correct a GDV and a gastropexy to hopefully prevent it from happening again. Very fast, very scary, and very expensive. He spent a few days in the clinic struggling with a rocky recovery, which the vets blamed on his age, and I blame on his Addisons. He's been home for several days now, is off of the pain meds, and thankfully seems to have more energy and appetite every day. He is also rocking a t-shirt that covers up his healing incision, and minimizes the time he has to spend in the cone of shame every day. The vets sent him home in a kelley green tee, that totally brings out the gold flecks in his eyes. He's definitely a winter - cranberry and cobalt are also good colors on him! Only half-kidding...

This week also included multiple memorial services. It's been an interesting experience to engage at various levels with them. One was for a dear lady I knew through church who was struggling with declining health and dreading potential long-term care solutions. Her children said that she "decided to go out on her own terms," and left this life a week before she was scheduled to move into an assisted living facility in Tuscon. We also sang at a memorial service for a friend's son, who lost his battle with brain cancer at 22. This service was packed, standing room only, and was full of the joy that he spread around him in his short time with us.

I've spent a lot of time thinking this week about what is truly important to me. At the end of the day, what will I remember? What seemingly urgent issues will be swept into the archives of memory and never brought out again? My little family was put through the ringer this week, but the joy that we shared when we could all be home together and at peace again made the challenging days worth the emotional and physical efforts. At the end of my life, what will be remembered about me? I would love to be able to say I created a legacy of joy and light. Since I've spent a good amount of time over the past few weeks considering what my priorities for 2015 should be, this has adjusted them slightly. What is the legacy you want to create?

Life is always unexpected, and sometimes it is hard. But the sun shines much brighter after a storm.

There is Deep Rest Here

As we celebrate this longest night and welcome the return of the light, I want to share a beautiful poem we featured in our concerts last weekend. Preparing to end 2013 and begin the new year, the Solstice is always an apt time to release any negative energies that have built up and focus on finding peace and joy to center myself. I wish you and yours the deep peace that is unique to this season.

I Have Found A Winter
I have found a winter in me
that before I kept at bay.
It whispers within
reminding me to calm
and come inside.

While I am mad for spring
and thrill to every fall, now I slow
and settle into winter's bare blanket.
There is deep rest here,
a quieting of the soul.
Threads frayed and severed, mend,
and even the cold silent days
spin dreams.
Candles cup their slender brave flames
for all the world a fire in the night.

Though the stern insistent business of schedules
stamps its foot, demanding we not look away,
the winter within hopes that we will.
That we will not turn
from its invitation to calm, to rest
to remember what we know
and to wonder, wait, and listen
for what we do not.

From Along the Way, New and Selected Poems by Linda Millemann.